Tuesday, October 9, 2012

Week 9

It will take you some time to understand how I got here from the last post, I'm still guessing... Truth is our surrogate is pregnant with triplets, we have a 9 months old son and our life is about to change forever. More changes? Yes, it seems I am destined to live a life I am not suppose to according to the normal, a life I am not able to visualize until is already happening. Today I am OK with that.

This is week 9 pregnancy and babies (two identical twins in one sack and another sibling in separate sack) look a lot less than a tadpole and more like human, I saw their arms, legs and umbilical cord last week. They move a lot, like humanoid kind of movement.

There is this dichotomy between the ideal and romanticism of this unusual  reproductive memento of having triplets and the reality of having to feed, change and to keep calmed 3 real babies plus my toddler to be, son Lorenzo. My minds keep telling me what I was inculcated during most of my life, females has this special power and natural ability to rise children, men are spoiled people who only provide money to the household and drink during the weekends, my hearts keep fighting and telling me, that is a lie, You Juan in the other hand are a good father, you have the courage to do this and you can see how Lorenzo is turning into a beautiful human being with the help your parenting ability.

Even with all the joy that 3 new babies can bring to our family, the fear is constant and consistent. I have to battle with my own demons on a daily basis, but I keep going with a large shield of hope and faith. God wants this to happen to us for a good reason, why me? I don't know why, my sponsor would say: why not you Juan? why not? and he is always right.

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